Today many countries celebrated Father’s day with their fathers thanking them and God for their service .However if there is any family role that has been scolded at by the World especially in the recent past , it is the father’s role .

This is coming due to the supposed end of Patriarchy and the rise of Matriarchy as an alternative .However it is not right to blame roles for destruction .It is right to seek the root of the destruction.

First of all when it comes to family building , it is the mothers who bear great responsibility having the tenacity of keeping things in order  .A mother not only feeds her children physically but feeds them with wisdom and moral principles at an early age.Yet the Father leads the mother in her home building role by offering protection, provision and guidance.

The Father and Mother are both providers but the mother both provides and builds the home even with the Father offering leadership for the family. He leads the mum tells the children to follow her follow him hence she builds the home .

This is why it is a commandment to help the fatherless because their provision has been halved the moment the father is not providing. This halved provision halves the quality of the life of the family both physically and spiritually.



They are a hosts of books that talk on why Fathers have let down society and are the cause of all psychological and societal  problems in the family.For example in America , the African American Society has been “thrown to the dogs ” by most academics because “the fathers have failed” .

Yet it is not so because  one has to look at why those fathers are not playing their roles well and not just heap the blame on them.It is not an issue of gender or sex, because even homes where the father is present ,criminals are being churned out into the society.

First of all the Society we are living in LOVES MONEY TO BOOT.

The Consumerist Economy hits the poor hardest because due to the mantra consume to live , the poor have little consumption power and therefore cannot save for their families .

Thus as they consume they cannot provide and when that happens most men opt to other ways of solving the problems one of them being crime which ends up putting them behind bars .Others just run away and leave their wives to bear the all the burdens.Others drink it all away or inject themselves with drugs to run away from the fear or reality of failure to provide for the family as a man.

Thus many Black Fathers are in jail because due to failure of achieving the American Dream opt for crime .They are more Blacks in jail because they make up the largest segment of the Urban poor compared to the  Rural Poor White  .It is not an issue of race but economics.

With the fathers in jail , the mothers have a halved provision which pours stress as the quality of life of the family diminishes thus more consumption less saving then falls into social welfare .

In general , both fathers and mothers are looking for money everywhere at the expense of building the home and thus the family is collapsing.


The love of money has made many families collapse .Most families are run as businesses today and not as places of love and belonging.Children who do well in school better than others in the family are key assets as the others are liabilities.

Paul used the word Love rightfully as sex is known as love making . In the KJV Bible the term sex is not there but the term” to know” is used to depict sex which is about love (forget the hypocritical division of sex from love).

The principle from that knowledge, lovemaking  is union .Thus to love is to unite with one  something whether sexually or based on family ties or friendship or knowledge of something .

To love money is to make friends with it spend so much time with it and put all your energies on it just as one would do to the spouse.Thus where money goes you are there.

So you find both father and mother run so much after money to the extent that they are not at home building their children spiritually or just being with them.

In the end, you have chaos of crimes and drug abuse and rebellion and all sorts of evils then the blame game of “This must be your Mother’s traits” or “Fathers are to blame ” take center stage .Yet it is the issue of priorities on both sides that has plagued the family not DNA !

If we would seek first the kingdom of God which Jesus said is Love, then the home can be put in order .Yet that same Jesus said that in the last days evil will be increase and not decrease .Thus this must mean the love of money will increase . This is what is killing the family not the fathers nor the mothers.

Arthur Owiti